Category: health and wellness

And-a Karen-in-Nah

Following is a letter I submitted to the fine folks of The Atlantic in response to their request for feedback on their app. I had fun. Judge as you will.

As much as I love reading The Atlantic through the very well designed app, I just don’t know how much longer I can deal with the passive-aggressive greetings before I lose what little sanity and self worth I’ve been able to hold onto in these pandemic times! It’s midnight here in New Mexico and I wish to relax with 30 minutes of reading, but my app — shall we call her Karen? — chooses to admonish me with, “Still awake?” Oh no, I’ve been caught! I’ve done something wrong! I can feel the shame in my body, face burning, chest tight, stomach — I don’t know how to describe the stomach thing. Then I think, “Obviously I’m awake, Karen. Unless there’s such a thing as sleep-phoning? Sleep-tabletting? Sleep-smart-thinging?” I gird up my loins (figuratively, as my actual loins aren’t much for the girding) and scroll through the highlights for Today like the desperate, late-night addict I apparently am, my interest piqued here and there, my mood lifting with anticipation of some satisfying reading, only to have Karen emerge at the end to shout at me, “Go to bed!” I’m left feeling small and wanting. I was looking forward to this. But Karen knows best. Or does she? I start negotiating with her. “It’s only a little after midnight, not 3:00 a.m.” “You know I’m on prednisone again for the lupus and I’m just not going to go right to sleep?”

Wait a minute, who the hell put Karen in charge of my schedule? Shouldn’t I be in charge of Karen’s schedule? Why can’t Karen tell me what a great reader I am or show a groovy graphic or really anything that doesn’t make me feel like a piece of crap for wanting to enjoy the reading room after hours? My private reading room, at that. Nothing would also work. I’ve looked in Settings more than once to see if there was a way to simply turn off the “Greetings” but no joy.

Please help. Please.

Sincerely, Debra Landau, Abashed Late-Night Reader (formerly Unabashed)

Superperfectionisticshamefilledprocrastinatious

And now for something completely different … kinda sorta maybe. When comparing similar things, my Aunt Lore liked to say a thing was “exactly the same only different.” So, yeah, it’s like that?

Three weeks ago I quietly went public with this here blog. My plan was to promptly add a Part 3 to my opening trilogy and scan in my hand-drawn logo, followed by an email campaign. Perfect!

But I couldn’t do it. I labored over Part 3 – in part due to a heavy brain fog. “Like pea soup,” is how my folks used to describe the thick fogs of my Pacific Northwest childhood home. Fact check: Fogs not nearly that green or smelly. (I hate split pea soup. Can you tell?) Also, I broke a tooth. It’s gone now, in its eternal resting place in molar hell. Grind in Power?!

I am a recovering perfectionist and I had me a relapse! Actually, my real addiction is to shame. According to Brené Brown, shame is the root cause of perfectionism and of much procrastination. I could find a link to BB … I’mma gonna let that go for now.

So, in the spirit of the following Sam Shepard quote, I may post other stuff before getting to Part 3: Collaboration means what now? (Non-working title)

I’m a great believer in chaos. I don’t believe that you start with a formula and then you fulfill the formula. Chaos is a much better instigator, because we live in chaos – we don’t live in rigorous form. –Sam Shepard–

The Duchess Draymond Pugbelly is ready for her romp in the snow!

Photo description: Adorable, black, short-faced dog wearing blue vest perched on closed SUV tailgate.